Squeaky Wheel Gets the Galaxy

Forgive me in advance...

If a supposedly maligned and disenfranchised group seeks reparations, where and how can they find them? Well, it appears by attacking celestial bodies.

The NAACP has recently mounted an attack on black holes. I wish I were making this up. Here is evidence of two fronts in this war on the suckers.

In the first video, African American Dallas city councilmen get worked up at the very use of the term 'Black Hole.'

In the next, you'll see as the NAACP mounts an assault on Hallmark over their use of the term 'Black Hole.'

So what do angry blacks gain by attacking black holes and scaring people from even using the term?

Well, in polytheism, celestial beings' power is relative to the belief in that power. So, as worship declines, so too does power. By reducing the number of times people say 'black hole', the militant few also decrease the power of black holes at large.

What consequences are there to this subtle attack on the theoretical gravitational giants? Well, recently scientists waited with bated breath for the expected creation of a black hole.

io9.com reports,

"A star went supernova with more than twice the mass needed to ultimately collapse into a black hole. "

But...

"But something weirder happened - the star became a magnetar, an asteroid-sized star with the most powerful magnetic field in the universe."

See?! In just a few short months, their assault has stopped the production of black holes. But why?

I'm convinced they are changing the course of Armageddon.

Black holes are gravitational, and will pull anything in. So the escape from this world which could happen via black holes is becoming less likely.

Super electromagnets only pull metals towards them. That's why these people are equipping themselves with more and more metals! So that when these new supermagnet stars do approach earth, they'll perform a racial-restrictive rapture--drawing forth the black hole killers by their grills, Mercedes hubcap medallions, and pinky rings.

Want more proof? Our first black president effectively cancelled NASA's space mission, so no one's going into space until this new evil plan unfolds.

Help us, Alpha Centauri, you're our only hope.

A Fire in the Sky?

A swirling halo effect was seen over Oslo, Norway on December 9, 2009, around the time President Obama was accepting his Nobel Peace Prize for wanting Peace. (Man, that guy is such a strong HOPE proponent that he doesn't even have to DO anything to succeed.)

Russian Missile? Space Aliens? Anti-Star of Anti-Bethlehem?

Check out the video of the effect here.

Some of the comments got me to thinking, specifically these:

earl223: "Its a rocket. The Russian were doing some test from a nuclear submarine in the White Sea and apparently a Bulava missile failed to launch properly."

FlourideHead: "Rocket, my arse! When did a rocket last make a huge 'rotating' perfectly symetrical spiral in the sky? Looks to me like classic ionization of the atmosphere using RF energy. Possibly a climate-change (secret) experiment beamed from the ground. Not very secret if you can see it from miles around!"

You tell him, FlourideHead! Let's think about this for a second.

What's an equal distance from Oslo as Russia? Geneva, Switzerland.

What's in Geneva Switzerland? The Large Hadron Collider (translated: Black Hole emitting doomsday device).

If they're equidistant, they're equi-probable. This all happened during a worldwide convention to determine international laws, just like happened in Geneva in the 1940s!

But can the Collider actually cause black holes? Let's check in with Revelation13.net, my favorite source:

"See my page on the danger of the CERN LHC particle accelerator in France becoming a Black Hole Doomsday Machine that may cause the December 2012 destruction of earth, and myvideo on it. There is a Nostradamus prophecy on this possibility. The CERN LHC was turned on again in November 2009, but it will be early 2010 before the more dangerous high energy collisions are done that could create Black Holes. You are going to hear statements like: "We turned it on and earth was not destroyed so this proves the LHC is safe". But the high energy collisions that could produce Black Holes won't be done until 2010. And if a Black Hole is created and goes to the center of the earth, there may be no sign of it for a year or two, until it gets large enough to start causing giant earthquakes and volcanoes, possibly eating earth from the inside on December 21 2012."

So it's not a sign that Obama is the Antichrist?

"And the election of President Barack Obama brings Hope to the world in a time of great economic crisis. I think the election of President Obama is part of a trend discussed on this page, where Hope for the world comes from the Southern Hemisphere."

Oh, ok then.

""Note that Kenya is on the equator, where the Southern Hemisphere begins. This is related to the 1987 Southern Hemisphere Supernova, which resulted in a wave of positive change in the Southern Hemisphere, with Democracy coming to South America and positive change in South Africa."

That's more than I need, thanks.

"President Obama brings Hope and new ideas, which this country and the world needs now."

Ok, seriously, stop.

"Turning around the U.S. economy will take time--"

I'm closing my browser right now.

"--since President Obama has inherited a wrecked U.S. economy--"

St-

"--with the national debt gone out of control--"

Hey-

"But personally I am very hopeful and encouraged, on President Obama's new ideas."

I'll take that as a 'no.'

SOURCES:

Revelation13.net

YouTube

CS Monitor