Squeaky Wheel Gets the Galaxy

Forgive me in advance...

If a supposedly maligned and disenfranchised group seeks reparations, where and how can they find them? Well, it appears by attacking celestial bodies.

The NAACP has recently mounted an attack on black holes. I wish I were making this up. Here is evidence of two fronts in this war on the suckers.

In the first video, African American Dallas city councilmen get worked up at the very use of the term 'Black Hole.'

In the next, you'll see as the NAACP mounts an assault on Hallmark over their use of the term 'Black Hole.'

So what do angry blacks gain by attacking black holes and scaring people from even using the term?

Well, in polytheism, celestial beings' power is relative to the belief in that power. So, as worship declines, so too does power. By reducing the number of times people say 'black hole', the militant few also decrease the power of black holes at large.

What consequences are there to this subtle attack on the theoretical gravitational giants? Well, recently scientists waited with bated breath for the expected creation of a black hole.

io9.com reports,

"A star went supernova with more than twice the mass needed to ultimately collapse into a black hole. "

But...

"But something weirder happened - the star became a magnetar, an asteroid-sized star with the most powerful magnetic field in the universe."

See?! In just a few short months, their assault has stopped the production of black holes. But why?

I'm convinced they are changing the course of Armageddon.

Black holes are gravitational, and will pull anything in. So the escape from this world which could happen via black holes is becoming less likely.

Super electromagnets only pull metals towards them. That's why these people are equipping themselves with more and more metals! So that when these new supermagnet stars do approach earth, they'll perform a racial-restrictive rapture--drawing forth the black hole killers by their grills, Mercedes hubcap medallions, and pinky rings.

Want more proof? Our first black president effectively cancelled NASA's space mission, so no one's going into space until this new evil plan unfolds.

Help us, Alpha Centauri, you're our only hope.

Putting the O in Orwell

It has come, a time where society's Orwellian 'Big Brother' fears have met with my own worst nightmare.

FoxNews reports that the White House administration is skirting typical press release methods and moving towards producing their own videos and releasing information on their own terms.

But FoxNews also claims that the media is in love with Obama and his administration. So if they're not avoiding the media because of animosity, why are they doing it?

The White House is opting to "communicate with Americans through its own brand of news releases, Tweets, videos and blogs."

Follow me as I show you what's going on here.

Obama released the American Reinvestment and Recovery Act (ARRA) of 2009.

ARRA funded a factory to develop organic light emitting diode (OLED) technology. What the heck are OLEDs? Here's how it's described by HowStuffWorks.com: "OLEDs are solid-state devices composed of thin films of organic molecules that create light with the application of electricity."

OLEDs allow for super thin monitor/TV displays, so thin they are flexible and able to be rolled up anywhere (or rolled onto anything).

"What if you could have a "heads up" display in your car? How about a display monitor built into your clothing? These devices may be possible in the near future with the help of a technology called organic light-emitting diodes (OLEDs)."

Can we all agree that what's really happening is the administration is simply developing the technology to paste monitors on your toilets, your cars, your kitchen sinks, the backboard of your local basketball hoop--even your computer monitors--so that Obama can get his subliminal messages out to all of us?

SOURCES:

FoxNews

HowStuffWorks

SimpleThoughts Blog

Drink Coke, Inch'Allah

Oh, man, is this a good one!

"Extremist Moslems have not dropped their allegations that Pepsi Cola is essentially the code name for a Zionist plot."

Yeah, I bet you didn't know those allegations existed, huh?! Well, they do. And Coca-Cola marketers--I mean Muslim clerics--aren't letting up. Because when you buy Pepsi you're really committing to "Pay Every Penny to Save Israel," according to terrorist group Hamas MP Salem Salamah.

"Cleric Abu Ismail all but called for a Muslim boycott of Pepsi because it stands for ‘Pay Every Penny Saving Israel.’"

Abu Ismail said a penny is “one-thousandth of a dollar.”

Oh, Abu, you blew it. A thousandth of a dollar? Really?

But then The Xenohistorian puts it into perspective, and my paranoid brain starts churning...

Hey says, "You could have fooled me. A better case can be made for Pepsi backing Barack Obama. Yesterday I saw the current Pepsi logo on a sign, in front of the country store I drive past on the way to work every day, and at first I thought it was the Obama logo sideways."

And then I find out that there are allegations that under Obama the Missile Defense logo has changed. Let's take a look.

Looks a lot like the Islamic symbol, no?

Wait, come to think of it. Doesn't a Coca-Cola bottle look a lot like a Scud Missile?

Oh man, does that mean that the swirling lights in Switzerland in December really WERE a Russian missile test? Is there an Obama-Russian-Muslim-Coke conspiracy?!?!

No wonder Tom Cruise is spending millions of dollars for a bomb shelter. He's not hiding from aliens, like this article suggests, but rather hiding from the coming doom here on earth.

SOURCES:

The Atlantic Wire

Xenohistorian

Israel National News

This London

Manchurian Candidate

The public debate (if there ever was one) over President Barack Obama's citizenship--and thus legitimacy as Commander in Chief--has long cooled. It doesn't make the news and you won't see people protesting it.

Then my inbox got hit with this:

"In a move certain to fuel the debate over Obama's qualifications for the presidency, the group 'Americans for Freedom of Information' has Released copies of President Obama's college transcripts from Occidental College. Released today, the transcript school indicates that Obama, under the name Barry Soetoro, received financial aid as a foreign student from Indonesia as an undergraduate. The transcript was released by Occidental College in compliance with a court order in a suit brought by the group in the Superior Court of California. The transcript shows that Obama (Soetoro) applied for financial aid and was awarded a fellowship for foreign students from the Fulbright Foundation Scholarship program. "

The email goes on to explain that not only does the scholarship (available only to foreign students) prove that Obama's not a natural born U.S. citizen, but it exerts that the U.S. Supreme Court has agreed to hear the case and determine whether we've got an imposter on our hands.

At first I thought, "Now we're getting somewhere." Because, love him or hate him, you need to know for sure if your president meets the minimum requirements for the job.

Then I decided to check up on the legitimacy of this email. I was quickly met with an onslaught of facts disproving virtually every fact in the email. EVERY fact. Basically the only thing that they got right was that the President's name is Barack Obama and he went to college.

So there's this half-baked chain email (that originated on April Fool's Day, no less) conspiring to bring about anger against the Commander in Chief. But I think there are darker purposes at work.

I'm fairly certain that the White House staff originated this email. Why? The email serves to console "birthers" into a sense that the issue is taken care of, that little else needs to be done, that the conflict will be resolved in due time. And if you don't know that the email's a hoax, then you'll likely forget about the issue and wait to hear about on the news (or in another mass email forward.) They're breeding complacency!

Don't tell me you're not complacent about this; two years ago people wouldn't gloss over the fact that George W. Bush lacked a mastery of the English language, but now everyone glosses over that fact that Obama may lack legitimate claim to the Presidency.

Then second part of this evil conspiracy is (all silliness aside): WHY DON'T YOU JUST PROVIDE PROOF THAT YOU'RE ELIGIBLE TO BE PRESIDENT OR STEP DOWN?! I mean, a military retiree with a military ID card can't even get a menial job without completing the I-9 form. The American people at best are being disregarded and at worst are being tricked, deceived, and led by an imposter.

SOURCES:

About

www.factcheck.org

Washington Post

A Fire in the Sky?

A swirling halo effect was seen over Oslo, Norway on December 9, 2009, around the time President Obama was accepting his Nobel Peace Prize for wanting Peace. (Man, that guy is such a strong HOPE proponent that he doesn't even have to DO anything to succeed.)

Russian Missile? Space Aliens? Anti-Star of Anti-Bethlehem?

Check out the video of the effect here.

Some of the comments got me to thinking, specifically these:

earl223: "Its a rocket. The Russian were doing some test from a nuclear submarine in the White Sea and apparently a Bulava missile failed to launch properly."

FlourideHead: "Rocket, my arse! When did a rocket last make a huge 'rotating' perfectly symetrical spiral in the sky? Looks to me like classic ionization of the atmosphere using RF energy. Possibly a climate-change (secret) experiment beamed from the ground. Not very secret if you can see it from miles around!"

You tell him, FlourideHead! Let's think about this for a second.

What's an equal distance from Oslo as Russia? Geneva, Switzerland.

What's in Geneva Switzerland? The Large Hadron Collider (translated: Black Hole emitting doomsday device).

If they're equidistant, they're equi-probable. This all happened during a worldwide convention to determine international laws, just like happened in Geneva in the 1940s!

But can the Collider actually cause black holes? Let's check in with Revelation13.net, my favorite source:

"See my page on the danger of the CERN LHC particle accelerator in France becoming a Black Hole Doomsday Machine that may cause the December 2012 destruction of earth, and myvideo on it. There is a Nostradamus prophecy on this possibility. The CERN LHC was turned on again in November 2009, but it will be early 2010 before the more dangerous high energy collisions are done that could create Black Holes. You are going to hear statements like: "We turned it on and earth was not destroyed so this proves the LHC is safe". But the high energy collisions that could produce Black Holes won't be done until 2010. And if a Black Hole is created and goes to the center of the earth, there may be no sign of it for a year or two, until it gets large enough to start causing giant earthquakes and volcanoes, possibly eating earth from the inside on December 21 2012."

So it's not a sign that Obama is the Antichrist?

"And the election of President Barack Obama brings Hope to the world in a time of great economic crisis. I think the election of President Obama is part of a trend discussed on this page, where Hope for the world comes from the Southern Hemisphere."

Oh, ok then.

""Note that Kenya is on the equator, where the Southern Hemisphere begins. This is related to the 1987 Southern Hemisphere Supernova, which resulted in a wave of positive change in the Southern Hemisphere, with Democracy coming to South America and positive change in South Africa."

That's more than I need, thanks.

"President Obama brings Hope and new ideas, which this country and the world needs now."

Ok, seriously, stop.

"Turning around the U.S. economy will take time--"

I'm closing my browser right now.

"--since President Obama has inherited a wrecked U.S. economy--"

St-

"--with the national debt gone out of control--"

Hey-

"But personally I am very hopeful and encouraged, on President Obama's new ideas."

I'll take that as a 'no.'

SOURCES:

Revelation13.net

YouTube

CS Monitor

"...til Obama Takes the T-Bird Away."

President Obama’s not only secretly a Nazi turning nursing homes into death camps with his health care legislation; he’s trying to destroy our national defense. His first step: decommission the F-22 Raptor.

“Critics argue the F-22 is too costly and irrelevant to the wars of today. They note that it hasn't flown a single mission in Iraq or Afghanistan.”

The F-22 doesn’t need to fly in Afghanistan, because as I’ve revealed earlier, aliens taught us how to use video games to kill. With UAV technology, our pilots sit in air conditioned rooms in Northern California using joysticks to destroy the enemy, just like they’re on X-Box Live.

Aside from hating freedom and wanting us all dead, why would The Big O seek to get rid of such a sleek, sexy piece of destruction?

“Obama promised in his address to Congress to reform our defense budget so that we're not paying for Cold War-era weapons systems we don't use."

Oh, he was talking about the F-22? I thought that was reference to shoe phones and watch lasers.

There has to be something else at play. While doing my research, I found an odd phenomenon. Evidence of a mythologically large bird referred to by fellow theorists as The Thunderbird has gone missing. On par with Big Foot and Nessie for creepiness and mystery, The Thunderbird was a large bird believed to be a pterodactyl or similar creature.

An account exists about French workmen encountering one in 1856: “In the half-light of the tunnel, something monstrous stumbled toward the out of a great boulder of Jurassic limestone they had just split open. It fluttered its wings, croaked, and died at their feet.”

Pictures abound from the 1850s and 1860s of huge birds held up by men, lying at the feet of Civil War soldiers, and the like.

The most iconic picture, revered as proof of the creatures’ existence, has vanished! Now the underground is searching for the proof, and asking for help:

"At this point there are almost 20 members of ATS who have memories of seeing this image...If it's not real, why do so many people remember seeing it?...If you are reading this, please feel free to help aid in the search and to contribute any opinions, theories, and ESPECIALLY MEMORIES!!!!"

Theories abound as to how the pics could disappear…here’s my favorite:

“The theory that "some force" could have removed all evidence of any of these cryptids from the Internet may be believable. I'm sure somewhere on the planet there is someone gifted enough to remove something in its entirety from the Internet.

That force: Audacious Hope. The President wants to rid any evidence of his link to prehistoric bird creatures, especially the F-22 Raptor!

What’s Obama’s link to giant mythological birds? Why would he want to cover it up? Leave your theories in the COMMENTS section below. One lucky theories will win a copy of The Little Book of Conspiracies, delivered to you!

PS: Kudos to B for being the 13th follower of CTT! Such a [un]lucky position in the enlightened culture we have going here. Much will be required of you very soon...

SOURCES:

OBAMA to Can the F-22
Thunderbird Pic Search - ATS
Thunderbird Pic Search - Cryptomundo